Monday, July 13, 2009

Old Habits Die Hard

Last week I experienced a particularly rough time of the month. I wouldn’t be candid and real if I didn’t address the hardships of trying to be healthy and making positive steps toward fitness whilst your PMS is raging and all you want for breakfast, lunch and dinner is a rock of salt covered in chocolate. Wouldn’t it be blissful if at our time of the month we painfully longed for celery? Alas, this is not the case, especially for me last week. I was in more pain than ever and sweet cravings were high. Overall I survived in an amazingly balanced way. A better than balanced way. I ate the below Oreo sized cookie (that was truly delicious), a brownie square, a couple of spoonfuls of frosting, and a little handful of Skittles. Over one week. With the exception of the Skittles, which were impulsive and consequently an unsatisfying waste of calories in the end, I really enjoyed my indulgences and they are quite few in actuality.
The old habit that won't seem to die is my habitual inability to forgive myself these discrepancies. How, after all of my work with focusing on balance (seriously I think balance is the most frequently used buzz word in this blog) and learning to allow myself small samples of everything to get the food/flavor experience while not overindulging, can I go home last Tuesday and break into tears over a tiny cookie? A percentage of that was hormonal, but a significant percentage of that was residual Self-Destructive BB30 sneaking in, a toxic person I banned from this fitness journey long ago. I feel so silly for investing one tear in being emotional and angry with myself for some reasonable indulgences. I need to forgive myself not for eating any of these things, but forgive myself for being much too tough on me and move on (even though it's hard)!

What old habits are putting up a fight to stay in your life?

Last week my goal was to lay off the peanut butter. I did very well with that. The reason behind that was that I was really eating a little too much of it. While my natural peanut butter is full of protein and healthy nut fat it still packs a caloric punch, and a couple of teaspoons a day can really add up. I wanted to lighten up a bit. Peanut Butter is definitely not banished in anyway-it's too good for me!

This week I am focusing on incorporating a strengthening work out to my exercising. While I am pretty devout to my elliptical, I think I need to begin some good foundation work on my core (cause it's not all about weight loss for sure). Perhaps a pilates or abs workout. Something to tone my middle!

Thank you
What's your goal for this week?

I have also once again stocked my fridge with pre-made frozen fruit bowls to enjoy at work. I've tossed in some new things. Each bowl now has a few banana slices and a little grapefruit. Yum! I am also still on my iced green tea kick. Such a healthy sippable!


  1. what do you put in your frozen fruit bowls? do you find they are mussy when you go to eat them?

  2. >> all you want is a block of salt covered in chocolate.

    Lol! It's so true...

    I'm working on portion control this week. Basic but important.

  3. @DKBTLT: I put frozen raspeberries, blueberries, blackberries and sliced starberries into plastic containers with a few slices of banana and some pieces of grapefruit. It definitely gets juicy as it melts so it needs a fork or spoon, but I just love it. I look forward to my daily fruit bowl!

    @musical kitten: SERIOUSLY!! What is it about salt and chocolate?????

  4. My friend Nan wrote a post over on her blog about this exact thing. While it is difficult, we are on this journey to better ourselves, not to beat ourselves up. No one wins every single day. Just pick yourself up, dust off, and start over. :-)

  5. I laughed out loud reading "a rock of salt covered in chocolate". That is so true! I swear I go through a bag of Tostios taco chips a day as well as a bowl of chocolate syrup with the tiniest amount of vanilla ice cream when I'm PMSing. Sometimes I wonder the damage our culture has done to us. What do women around the world, who have never had an oreo or taco chips, crave when its their time of the month?

    Keep up the good work girl! Don't get down on yourself. We all need to indulge ourselves!

    One of my life balancing goals is to find a few things that I love to do and indulge on those every chance I get. I turn to food when I'm bored or feeling down so it's nice to replace that behavior with something else. Currently it is giving myself manis and pedis!